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Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Securing the Border With Atomic Power- Or, How to Kill Two Birds With One Isotope

The US has thousands of tons of nuclear waste uselessly decaying in containment facilities. At the same time, all efforts to secure the border with Mexico have failed. Could there be a way to solve both these problems at the same time? I believe so.

I propose the construction of an atomic fence on the border. This fence will be made up of thousands of blocks of Cobalt-60, which has a short half-life but still produces enough gamma radiation to make safe approach impossible. Small gaps could be left in the fence at major crossings so as not to interfere with regular commerce.

Additionally, any creatures unfortunate enough to venture too close to the radiation fence would quickly die and their ghastly corpses would serve as a further warning to trespassers.

Radiation has a number of advantages over lesser obstacles such as landmines or a burning river of napalm. Among these are lower construction and maintenance costs as well as greater killing power.

All that is left is to come up with a catchy name. Here are several suggestions:

1) The Great Wall of America
2) The Freedom Wall
3) The Atom Shield of Democracy

I think 3) is a real winner. Jonathan Swift would approve.  

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