Tuesday, December 31, 2024
Military Struggles to Recruit People With Normal Testosterone Levels
Monday, December 30, 2024
AI Poem #1 - Fossil Ode
Americans Unsure If CEO Murder Bad
Thursday, December 26, 2024
NJ Hires Moon Nazis to Fight Drones
TRENTON - "Drastic times call for drastic measures", explained Governor Phil Murphy at a press conference held Friday. The controversial proposal calls for the first very foreign aid program whereby scientists and engineers of the former Third Reich will be tasked with countering the sudden influx of mystery drones targeting the Garden State. "First off, let's not use the other N-word. Operation Paperclip and NASA set the precedent for this over 50 years ago. And yes, while the existence of a German colony on the dark side of the moon may come as a shock to many, is it really that hard to believe? How many of you knew that the first man-made object to reach outer space was a German V2 rocket in 1944?"
"We will be most happy to share the fruits of our secret labors", said Raumfahrerfuehrer Siegfried Wagner von Ulm in a radio interview with NPR's science correspondent Joanna Gambolputty. "If nothing else, it relieves the tedium of life that we have endured for 80 years. It is extremely difficult to brew decent beer or make good sausage up there. And no visitors either except for the occasional wayward cosmonaut, though the fresh DNA from the ova of the female ones was certainly appreciated. We waited in silence for the right time to return, but unfortunately, our politics only became less popular with the passage of time. Even so, perhaps we can redeem ourselves by displaying our technological prowess. It has only grown since the days of the so-called Wonder Weapons."
Von Ulm went on to explain the technical details of his people's moon habitat, which includes various schools, laboratories, workshops, mines, power plants, and refineries. As a result, he has been swamped with requests from millions of science fiction fans and aspiring astronauts for permission to immigrate to the Dunkelmondlandberg, as the colony calls itself. However, von Ulm said they can only afford to integrate those of superior intellectual and physical qualities, though they would welcome deliveries of cargo, such as schnapps, cheese, and pretzels, that might help them return to earth. "We would be more than happy to turn our base over to NASA other space explorers in exchange for citizenship and help in adjusting back to life with normal gravity."
In the meantime, the lunar Germans have promised to assist from afar. "We have, of course, been monitoring broadcasts from earth and so are aware of such concepts as 'work from home', 'remote work', 'coffee badging', etc. This we will continue with respect to the drone problem until we can finish a suitable re-entry spaceship ferry apparatus. I expect it to proceed at a much faster pace than the construction of our Außerordentlichehochgeschwindigkeitselektronenentwickelndesschwerarbeitsbeigollitron. That was spearheaded by the esteemed professor Johann Jakob Jingleheimerschmidt. Furthermore, we note with both surprise and concern that your educational system is so dysfunctional that you must reach out to such a backwater as ours to find engineering talent. I have been told that this situation has been normal for some time and that you even have a special visa program to act as an antidote."
There have been protests both for and against the Mondvolk, as they like to call themselves, with supporters eager to learn their secrets of space survival and opponents going so far as to say they should be exterminated preemptively because of their superior technology and historically aggressive nature. However, the ACLU and SPLC have stated that should the spacemen land in Mexico and cross the southern border, they should be considered undocumented immigrants and be free to display their swastika flags while parading in Skokie just like other Illinois Nazis.
Tuesday, December 24, 2024
hair haiku and limerick - poems 29 and 30
long strands brown and white
stretch from twelve seasons of growth
hair like a lion's mane
***
he grew his hair so long
though many thought it wrong
it looked so damn fine
in the spring sunshine
made him feel like King Kong
Monday, December 23, 2024
jail haiku and limerick - poems 27 and 28
metal door clangs shut
hours pass safe from winter cold
until cell opens
***
a man once went to jail
it left him feeling frail
but once back in bed
at his own homestead
he enjoyed his new tale
Sunday, December 1, 2024
Greetings to my readers in Brazil
Congrats, you knocked Singapore and Russia off their perch to claim the number 2 spot.
Friday, November 29, 2024
Sunday, November 24, 2024
Extraterrestrial amino acids from the Murchison meteorite and their possible uses (HMT - hexamethylenetetramine as the precursor)
Correction: while the meteorite contained "alien" amino acids (such as isovaline), the chemicals mentioned below are NOT amino acids.
***
Original paper: Extraterrestrial hexamethylenetetramine in meteorites—a precursor of prebiotic chemistry in the inner solar system
Diagram from here: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41467-020-20038-x?fromPaywallRec=false
All nine alien (forgive the hyperbole) amino acids contain a complex ring structure with four nitrogen atoms.
In my dictionary of important organic compounds, I noted that similar molecules containing only CHNO with only four nitrogen atoms include: pentamidine, telmisartan, irinotecan, rifampicin, vinblastine, and others.
https://platedlizard.blogspot.com/2023/11/dictionary-of-useful-organic-compounds_11.html
The aforementioned compounds are mostly either antifungals or antibiotics derived from fungi, yet their chemical structures are totally different from the alien amino acids.
It would be worthwhile to see what medicinal purposes these alien amino acids and related compounds might have. HMT (was discovered in 1859 by Butlerov and an industrial process for its synthesis exists.
While some medical uses of HMT are known (it has been used to treat urinary tract infections), I do not think the properties of its amino acid cousins have been studied to the same extent.
Friday, November 22, 2024
Hired Raygun - part 7
Sunday, November 10, 2024
Sunday, November 3, 2024
A collapse in my online dating popularity
What goes up must come down. After 14 years of online dating, I'm now qualified to be a tour guide in hell.
From January:
Friday, November 1, 2024
The Idiot Presidents of My Lifetime
Monday, October 28, 2024
Romanian Captions Glitch on Boondocks Clip
The audio is clearly English, yet YouTube detected Romanian for some reason.
link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oLaCI8h9A1g
I suspect more electronic tomfoolery from my former employer:
Tuesday, October 22, 2024
Paul Harrell did not kill anyone in 1967 because he was born in 1966 - removed by Facebook
Just more proof that macho men always tell tall tales. Mundus vult decipi, ergo decipiatur.
link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=43eqKhpu5w0
Odd YouTube auto-generated captions glitch
Its language recognition and translation software are excellent, so I'm wondering how it could confuse English with Czech. Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TyQ0hzq4hYE
See what auto-generated captions you get.
Sunday, October 20, 2024
Brahmagupta's formula, Heron's formula, and the circumscription of polygons
I noticed recently that the formulas of Heron and Brahmagupta have the same structure, and thus I conjecture that any polygon with sides (a, b, c, d, etc.) and a semi-perimeter (s) that can be circumscribed will have an area (A) given by the following equations:
s = (a + b + c + d ....)/2
A = sqrt[(s - a)(s -b)(s - c)(s - d)....]
Heron's formula (for the area of any triangle)
s = (a + b + c)/2
A = sqrt[(s - a)(s -b)(s - c)]
Brahmagupta's formula (for any cyclic quadrilateral)
s = (a + b + c + d )/2
A = sqrt[(s - a)(s -b)(s - c)(s - d)]
Saturday, October 19, 2024
Most Popular NBA YouTube Clip
I was curious what the most popular NBA (basketball) clip on the internet is and stumbled upon this. Does this guy want to shoot his own dick off? I hope he does shoot his own dick off. Even if he wants to shoot akimbo John Wick style, why carry them like that? I'm a fan of the New York reload, but your guns need to stay put until you need them.
Oh yeah and the title of the clip got garbled somehow. Probably has nothing to do with the fact that I'm ex-NSA.
source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CiatfSQ0xwg
Wednesday, October 16, 2024
Most Expensive Warplane Built So Far Taken Down By Tiny Bird
I said years ago that the F-35 sucks.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EFo-5TBIRPI
When I tried to share the above video on Facebook, I got this:
Tuesday, October 8, 2024
Saturday, October 5, 2024
My Fort Gordon Alligator Encounter