Total Pageviews

Saturday, June 6, 2009

A New Pro-Atheist Slogan & Talking to North Korea

This week, I have a double feature. Apologies for the weird formatting- Blogger is being a jerk today.

In London, a bunch of atheists got the phrase "There's probably no god, now stop worrying and enjoy your life" painted on the side of a few buses. I feel this slogan is sort of lame so I've been trying to think of a better one. Here's my suggestion:

Welcome to Earth.
Please refrain from theft, rape, and murder.
The other guests will appreciate your courtesy.
Enjoy your visit.
Now for North Korea. By all accounts of the handful of people who have managed to escape from it, North Korea is miserable shit-hole ruled by the closest thing there is in real life to a comic book supervillian. Still, their actions have some rational basis. As of this moment, there are over 30,000 US combat troops plus another 20,000 or so South Korean troops poised on the other side of the DMZ, ready to invade at a moment's notice. They also perform regular exercises to practice for it. Keep in mind that this force is within 100 miles of North Korea's capital. People who see enemies at the gates tend to be jumpy. Imagine the US reaction if the Russians stationed 30,000 troops in Toronto. People would be very, very nervous, and probably fall in behind hardline politicians promising protection from "them."
I think the Waco stand-off provides a good small-scale analogy for this. A bunch of nuts had a compound in Texas, which is not itself a crime, but word leaked out that weapons were being stockpiled and children were being abused. Given the events at Jonestown, it 's not surprising that there was wide public support to defuse the situation. Unfortunately, The ATF and FBI did a pretty piss-poor job of scaling things down. I'm no hostage-negotiator, but if your goal is to calm down the leader of a doomsday cult, surrounding his compound with military vehicles and heavily-armed police might not be the best way to go about doing it. In the ensuing shootout and fire, about 90 people were killed.
I think the best way to deal with the North Koreans is to ignore them completely. First, cut-off the aid, then remove the troops. With no more outside help or enemy to focus their hatred on it, perhaps they will begin wondering why all there is to eat is sawdust soup.

No comments: