Hilarious Gunphobia

A letter recently submitted to an advice column:

"Our toddler has been in a wonderful day care center since September, and she has grown particularly attached to her primary caregiver, a young single woman in her late 20s. She and I recently shared a casual conversation about dating, and she emailed me with a sweet video of our daughter and offered to babysit if needed. I looked her up on Facebook, and one 10-month old post—registering gleeful delight after a weekend shooting various guns, and declaring her interest in getting a gun permit—caught my attention. While we realize her adventure, and wish, are entirely legal, this makes both my husband and me very uncomfortable since we have absolutely no interest in having guns anywhere near our child, our family, or our home. Prudie, what should we do? Tell the director of the day care? Just avoid hiring her to babysit our child? Simply chalk this up to the Second Amendment?"

They say they do not want any guns near them, their child, or their home. I wonder what these people do when they see a cop? Run away and hide? Flail their arms while screaming "AAAAAH! GUN! GUN!" 
Do they plan on avoiding all sporting goods stores? How about museums? Or Wal-Mart? 

Did it ever occur to them that just because the babysitter like to shoot doesn't mean she's carrying all the time? Apparently, just having touched a gun is enough to taint her. 

These people think a gun is like the Ring of Sauron- no one can possess one without being turned into a murderous fiend by its corrupting evil power. 

Obama's understanding of economics

Sam Seder & Progressive Projection

Sam Seder says: "The difference between liberals and libertarians is liberals look towards results."

Oh really?

Have liberals adjusted their views based on the disastrous roll-out of Obamacare?
Or the slow death of Detroit?
Or the trillions wasted on the war on poverty?
Or the failure of gun control?
Or unemployment caused by the minimum wage?
Or the success of school vouchers?
Or the effect of tax cuts?

Liberals have never cared about results- only intentions. When they accuse libertarians of utopian fantasies, they are merely projecting.

Parallel Thinking: Sun Tzu and Mohamed

"War is deceit"

-Mohamed

"All warfare is based on deception."

-Sun Tzu

Great minds think alike. 

The Big Rock Statist Mountains- A Parody

One evening as the polls closed down
And the folks went back home grumbling,
Down the track came a voter hiking,
And he said, "Guys, I'm not staying 
I'm headed for a land that's far away
Besides the crystal fountains
So come with me, we'll go and see
The Big Rock Statist Mountains

In the Big Rock Statist Mountains,
There's a land that's safe and clean,
Where you never need to lock your door
And folks of are never mean
Where no crooks ever get away
And the sun shines every day
And great public schools 
And clean swimming pools
The great big malls
Where prices fall
In the Big Rock Statist Mountains.

In the Big Rock Statist Mountains
All politicians never lie
And the laws make perfect sense
And everyone loves the FBI
The dollar is always strong
And everybody has job 
Oh I'm bound to go
Where we have no foes
Where no one robs
And there is no mob
In the Big Rock Statist Mountains.

In the Big Rock Statist Mountains
All the kids can read
And everyone has enough to eat
And all get what they need
There are no drunks or junkies 
And the streets are nice and neat
The whores are gone
And the children smile
The perfect roads go
for miles and miles
In the Big Rock Statist Mountains

In the Big Rock Statist Mountains,
We'll never lose a war.
All the kids are well-behaved 
and always do their chores
There ain't no smut on TV
No porn on the internet
I'm bound to stay
Where you salute all day,
To the smillin' face
Shown in every place
In the Big Rock Statist Mountains.
....
I'll see you all this coming fall
In the Big Rock Statist Mountains

The Lie of Equality

Is everyone the same gender? The same height? Weight? Age? Strength? Intelligence?

Clearly, no. Inequality is the norm and there isn't much that can be done about it. So why worry about inequality of money when people are unequal in so many other deep-set ways?

It can't be said enough times- the only way people can be equal in a meaningful sense is if they are held to the same standard. 

How to defend against an asteroid

The first and hardest method is the Armageddon approach- blow it up with a nuke. Depending on its size, many bombs might be necessary to break it into smaller pieces. Even then, the larger chunks would still cause a lot of damage and probably throw up enough dust to disrupt farming for a while.

Next we have the Big Push- use a nuke to push it out of the way. The hitch with this is that a nuclear explosion by itself would not produce much of a push. The blast from a nuke comes from air being heated rapidly and then expanding. If you wanted to use a nuke to push something in space, there would need to be some gas or liquid with the bomb to get hot and expand. 

I don't think attaching rockets would work. Although rockets are the only way to get things in orbit, they are not very efficient. You'd have to attach many, many rockets to get any kind of push. 

The last, and I think most practical option, is to build bunkers and shelters to ride out the impact and effect of decreased sunlight. Using technology like cloud seeding might be helpful in washing the dust out of the air. 

As an honorable mention, I'll mention a thunderwell type device- this uses a nuke to create steam which propels an object at a fantastic speed. It was discovered during a nuclear test when a hunk of metal was accidentally blast miles and miles into the sky. The hunk traveled so fast that it partially melted.