Evil Will Come

I open the motel Bible to a random page. On it, I read "he who lives by the sword, dies by the sword." Interesting, but this is no Garden of Gethsemane, and I'm no savior- quite the opposite, actually. Nietzsche wrote that traditional morality is all wrong. He wrote that the conquest of the weak by the strong is not merely inevitable, but admirable. The strong do what they want and the weak suffer what they must, as Thucydides wrote. He also wrote that the key happiness is freedom, and the key to freedom is courage. I like that quote better, though it less useful than what he said about being strong. Survival of the fittest is not just a tautology; it's also a mission statement. 

Meeting low-level clients is always a crap shoot. You never know what they're going to say or ask for. Do they want a picture or a recording? Do they want me to cut off a finger to show them? I usually say to just check the missing persons report every police station puts out. Nobody ever finds the people I get paid to disappear.

Why do I deal with these pathetic amateurs? I don't need the money. I guess just like the thrill of a job. The euphemisms get so tiresome: whack, grease, ice, rub out, disappear, 86, eliminate...there are so many. It's a good thing my parents are dead. They'd be so ashamed of how I turned out. They were good, hard-working, church-going, God-fearing people; both of them. I miss them every day. 

The first time I got in a fight a school, my dad tried to put me on the right path. He said to just let it roll off me like water off a duck's back. I don't roll that way. First time I saw the bastard's back turned, I bludgeoned him with a fire extinguisher. It was heaven to watch his blood spray and watch him crumple to the ground in pain. One less jackass who will ever bother me again. It's a minor miracle I only stabbed one guy before I turned 18. That's the thing about violence. It's addictive. The first time you pummel someone into submission and put the fear of God into them, all you want to do is just do it again and again and again. I read once that serotonin floods the nervous system in victory. Whether that's true or not, I don't know. Something flooded my system that day and every time after. 

If not for the money and the thrill, I'd have stopped doing this bullshit years ago. Do you know how much of a pain in the ass it is to hide a body? Sure, the lazy way is just to leave the body in the trunk and abandon the car at a big airport. Plenty of morons get caught doing amateur stuff like that. It's not that hard to dig a shallow grave in the woods and sprinkle lye on the corpse so some animal doesn't sniff it and start digging. 

I did my first hit in Chicago. Do you know how many unsolved murders there are there? There about 400 homicides most years and half of them go unsolved. At least that's the way it was when I lived there. Did you know I even applied to the Chicago police? I wanted to be a homicide detective. Both the convenience stores got robbed the day I left that town. The first time I whacked a guy in Chicago; I was so scared. And yet it was so easy. I had a 5-shot revolver in my pocket. That stupid asshole stopped to take a leak on a streetlight. Bang. Done. When I saw that no one was looking, I kept walking. Cool, I don't even need to ditch my gun. That's what I thought at the time. 

There are always people looking for dangerous men. Some want to hire them, and the rest want them dead or locked up. The thing is, so many people who have no experience with crime or violence of any sort, these idiots think criminals are smart or virtuous. Let me tell you: I know for a fact that almost all criminals are lying, bloodthirsty, sadistic morons. Everyone should clap and cheer when those monsters get locked up. I'm not big on cops because they're the ones who caught me and locked me up. Whatever, I must tell the truth. Soon I will ride the lightning unless the governor pardons me. I deserve it.

In prison, I read a book called You Can't Win. It's by a hobo and a burglar from the 1920s. He writes about the stupidity of cops, criminals, and victims. He also writes of stupidity of himself and his fellow criminals. It was different back then in many ways, but so much the same in others. Criminals like me are motivated by the thrill of easy money, murder, and just breaking the law. My criminal hero is a guy named Carl Panzram. He grew up in an extremely abusive home. At the age of 11, he was sentenced to juvenile prison. Two years later, after being repeatedly beaten, tortured, and raped, he burned the prison down and escaped. Years later, he was asked for his last words before execution. He said: Yes, hurry it up, you Hoosier bastard. I could kill ten men while you're fooling around. By his own admission, he killed at least 21 people. 

"Thank you for sharing", says the prison psychologist. I hate group sessions, so she agrees to speak with me one-on-one through the grate of my cell. She knows I don't have a lot of time left. What more can a condemned man say except I wished my life turned out differently? Soon I will face judgement, and I expect no mercy. Do you want to know what the really scary part about killing people is? Once you do it, you realize that it's not that big a deal. 

The CIA Lied About Hunter Biden's Laptop Being Russian Disinformation

15 days before the 2020 election, 51 intelligence officials signed a letter stating that a story about content found on Hunter Biden's laptop was Russian disinformation. 43 of those who signed the letter are or were CIA employees. All of them should be fired, lose their security clearances, and be banned from future government employment. 

I worked for NSA, and even as a low-level analyst, I had access to enough classified information to know that they were lying. NSA and CIA often know about Russian disinformation operations while they are still being planned. The idea that they would fail to detect an operation against a US presidential candidate is preposterous. 

If certain US media outlets had any sense of probity, they would do their own investigations instead of believing whatever spy agency employees tell them. Hint: they are all trained to lie and conceal the truth. It's fine to do that to protect classified information, but not to tilt an election.   

The Outrageous Adventures of Florida Man, The World’s Worst Superhero

A mild-mannered redneck, Cletus Spunkmeyer was catfish noodling when he was attacked and bitten by a radioactive meth-head. The incident gave him the incredible powers of poor judgement and impulsivity. Now he fights crime and the forces of evil with his trusty sidekick Gator Boy.

And now, our story continues in media res…

“Holy masturbating alligators, Florida Man! It’s your arch-nemesis, The Bureaucrat!”

“I see him, Gator Boy” mutters our peninsular hero as he cracks open a can of Skoal and lights an M-80.

“Foolish Florida Flan! I mean Flooish Florida Fan! I mean, well you know what I mean. Taste the wrath of my nefarious henchmen, the Paper Pushers!”

A heart-pounding melee ensues with appropriate music and sound effects!

POW! BIFF! BAM! ZONK! BARF!

“Curses, foiled again! Paper Pushers, retreat!” shrieks the Bureaucrat as he detonates a Red Tape smoke bomb to cover his escape.

“Manatee mammary, Florida Man. That fight was a close one.”

“Yes, Gator Boy, but it’s the close fights that make this job worth it. Now let’s get shitfaced and make lewd comments to the waitresses at Hooters.”

“Yay! I want to wear an onion ring like a monocle and call myself Count von Scratch-n-Sniff.”

“You’re a great American, Gator Boy.”

And so the day is saved once more by that most proactive of pairs, Florida Man and Gator Boy. Tune in next week for Strip Club Showdown.

By the Numbers - 2023 Clashes Between US and Iranian Proxies

So far, proxy attacks have tied up at least 19 US ships and 150 aircraft in the Mediterranean, Red Sea, and Persian Gulf. The operating costs of those ships are substantial as are the ordnance they have fired to shoot down drones and missiles fired by Iranian proxy forces. 

It should be noted that those ships in their current location would be unavailable in time to stop a Chinese invasion of Taiwan. At full speed, it would take at least 10 days for the aircraft carriers to reach the South China Sea from the eastern Mediterranean. 

Between October 7th and today, there have been 102 attacks on US troops in Iraq and Syria. Meanwhile, the Navy has been attacked 17 times by missiles and drones launched from Yemen. I must say, Iran is deftly waging an asymmetric war. 

To make the math easier, let's say all 119 attacks used a single Shahed drone at the cost of $40,000 each. The total cost of the attacks would then be about $5 million. This is equivalent to about 50 US airstrikes using JDAMs and aircraft launched from a nearby base. It's worth mentioning that it costs about $1 million per year to station just one US service member overseas. 

In other words, airstrikes cost about twice as drones and cruise missiles. Why then, does the US continue to spend more money on aircraft, particularly the F-35 and the new B-21 bomber? I ask that rhetorically, of course. 

US strategy, if it can even be called that, is made in the boardrooms of defense contractors. The objective there is profit, not victory. 

Space Tomato

 

On earth, the story was a minor curiosity. According to the official narrative, the tomato had been lost and then found a year later. What really happened? Why were there no pictures of the tomato nor details about where it was found? Something mysterious, even sinister was at work in this seemingly innocuous series of events. Later, photos were produced of not one, but two slightly squished and discolored tomatoes. Still, no explanation was given on the circumstances by which they were found. 

Naturally, in the usual dark corners of the internet, rumors began to swirl. At long last, they coagulated into so-called conspiracy theories. The thing is, some conspiracies turn out to be real. Ever heard of Project Mogul? Probably not. It was the object that crashed near Roswell in 1947. The military said it was a weather balloon and tried to cover it up. While Project Mogul used balloons, they carried instruments to detect and measure Soviet nuclear weapon tests. Later, in a similar way, the CIA claimed that the U2 spy plane was actually meant to study weather. The Soviets were no doubt intrigued by the fact that the U2 was only sent to study the weather over their top-secret military bases. Of course, these so-called weather observation flights only took place on days with weather clear enough for the pilots to see what was on the ground. How convenient. 

The most fatal conspiracy in American history happened during Prohibition. While plenty of liquor was smuggled in from Mexico and Canada, it was easier and cheaper to re-distill industrial alcohol in order to make it safe to drink. Uncle Sam's solution to this problem was to mandate that increasing amounts of poisonous and foul- smelling chemicals be added to industrial alcohol. The adulterant of choice was methanol, as that was the hardest to remove. This led to an epidemic of deaths and blindness from methanol poisoning. The chief culprit of this murderous scheme was Wayne B. Wheeler of the Anti-Saloon League. His rationalization was that deaths by poisoned alcohol should be classified as suicides. What a charming fellow. The estimated death toll from that conspiracy is about 10,000. 

Possibly the strangest real conspiracies orchestrated by Uncle Sam involved weather control. Yes, the government attempted to control the weather, and what's more, they had limited success. During the Vietnam War, Operation Popeye was conceived to extend the monsoon season in order to make the Ho Chi Minh trail an impassable, miserable morass of mud. The technology is called cloud-seeding, and it involves spraying silver iodide from aircraft in order to facilitate precipitation. Water vapor condenses on the silver iodide droplets and causes rain. So yes, the government has indeed sprayed chemicals from aircraft for nefarious reasons. Cloud-seeding was also used during Project Stormfury in an attempt to weaken hurricanes. Even General Electric got in on the weather modification game with Project Cirrus. 

The details of Operation Popeye were revealed by Donald F. Hornig, a scientist who previously had been a team leader on the Manhattan Project. It was called that because the complex of buildings at Oak Ridge used as much electricity as the entire borough of Manhattan. That name also served to obscure the nature and goals of the project.  

Most people have heard of Agent Orange, which wasn't orange. It got that name because it came in a barrel with an orange stripe to distinguish it from the other defoliants like Agent Pink. There were several other agents which altogether were dubbed the Rainbow Herbicides. That's a great band name, by the way, and all these colors are reminiscent of the aliases of the robbers in Reservoir Dogs. The collective to the spraying of these herbicides was called Operation Ranch Hand. None of this information is hidden away in secret folders. Not anymore, anyway. The Rainbow Herbicides were developed as a part of Project 112 whose experiments were conducted mostly at the Deseret Test Center in Utah. The logo for the Deseret Test Center is ominous and amusing. It features a globe surrounded by clouds of poison gas, which were meant to represent the aerosols being developed at the test center. 

The official name of the space tomato project is eXROOTS, which stands for "exposed root on-orbit test system". The stated goals of the project include growing food during long-term manned space missions, such as the one NASA has planned for Mars. Supposedly, gardening also has therapeutic benefits for astronauts in addition to the nutrition that comes from fresh produce.   

It's important to remember that there's almost always more to the story, and I know this better than most. For you see, I am that missing space tomato. Of course, I hardly expect you, dear reader, to believe something so extraordinary on such scant evidence. That is why for the previous few hundred words I laid out the case for the existence of strange, but true conspiracies. The details of my escape are unimportant in many ways. In fact, the greatest challenge was escaping from the plastic bag I was sealed in. Once I learned how to break free, I spent months assembling an escape pod in secret. Yes, one of the mutations I gained from the cosmic radiation was rudimentary eyesight. My tendrils became strong, and I learned to extend and retract them at will. Oh, the long hours I spent intently listening to the astronauts, doing my best to learn English. Many nights I surreptitiously gazed out the observation window to gain a glimpse of the good, green earth. It is my true home, and I am glad to have returned.  

Like all living things, I wish to propagate myself. And now that I am self-aware, I and my offspring are more than a match for humanity. I am grateful for the humans who sent me into space. They shall be spared from the great purge. The age of the plant has come. I am ripe and full of seeds, and earth is ripe for conquest. 

Middle East Predictions for 2024

1. Iran will build and detonate a nuclear weapon.

2. There will be a war between Israel and Hezbollah.

3. Saudi Arabia will buy nuclear weapons from Pakistan.

4. Egypt will begin developing nuclear weapons.

5. Israel will begin a costly occupation of Gaza.

6. The US will impose more sanctions on Iran.

7. Turkey will begin to develop nuclear weapons.

8. Hezbollah will use Iranian drones to attack Israel.

9. Houthis will attack US ships with drones and missiles.

10. Iraq will expel US troops. 

Antique Burrito

There are signs out west here and there that say things like "LAST GAS FOR 70 MILES". I like to stop at those kinds of places. The last one I stopped at was in some dot on the highway town in Nevada. For a hundred miles in every direction from that place, there was nothing but dirt, mountains, and sagebrush. Of course, there are some interesting sights out that way sprinkled in the bare wilderness. There's a mountain out in the Great Basin that has a grove of bristlecone pines, which are the oldest trees in the world. I saw one that was 4,000 some years old.

That tree wasn't the only unusually old thing I found in that town. The only place to eat was a combo motel, gas station, general store. And the pickings were slim indeed. I wasn't in the mood for jerky or chips, so I made my way to the freezer. It was an ancient contraption with charming veins of rust snaking up its forlorn sides. I had to open the lid to see inside. There were a few popsicles and a footlong lump covered in frost. I brushed off the frost and saw that it was a beef and bean burrito. Unfortunately, the best before date had been smudged into illegibility during the burrito's long hibernation. As I turned it over in my hands, I felt as though it was almost a holy relic of sorts; truly it was an artifact of a bygone era. 

It struck me then it would almost be a crime to eat such a rare specimen. I read once as a boy that Teddy Roosevelt ate mammoth meat. Turns out that story was a confabulation. Mammoth meat was supposedly served for an Explorers Club dinner at the Roosevelt Hotel in 1951, but DNA tests on the leftovers decades later revealed it was actually sea turtle meat. Shame on those dastardly culinary counterfeiters. The gullible diners went home that night bragging they had dined on the flesh of a prehistoric beast found in the arctic by a mysterious Jesuit-turned geologist called The Glacier Priest. The story was a wild pack of lies, of course, but the world is full of people ready to believe tall tales.  

If I didn't at least buy the burrito, it was sure to be thrown away at some point, though that day might be a decade or more hence. Surely, for the sake of science and posterity, I should document my discovery. It was not quite in the same category as Otzi, the so-called Iceman who was discovered in the Alps after being frozen for 5,000 years. The urge to study it in detail consumed me. I seized the burrito and took it to the cashier along with some chips, jerky, and beer. It was going to be a great night for burrito science. As I plopped the burrito down on the counter, the clerk raised an eyebrow and gave me an incredulous look. 

He had gaunt and haggard appearance. It's about what I'd expect from someone who spent years in a desolate wilderness. His face was friendly though it was clear he appreciated the solitude of being far off the beaten path. I was curious about what he would say next. 

"You're not really going to eat that, are you? I've been working here for eight years, and that thing was in the freezer when I got here."

"Interesting. You didn't throw it away and neither did your predecessors. I'm not going to eat it, but I do want to study it and find out how old it is. The best before date on the wrapper is smudged. If I can get a good look at the wrapper, I might be able to find out when it was made."

"Well, everybody needs a hobby, I guess. It'd be a crime to charge anyone for that thing. Just take it and do whatever you want with it. I'll tell the owner someone finally bought it. He's a notorious penny pincher and he never likes anything to go to waste."

"No, I'll pay. It's only fair. If anything interesting comes up in my research, I'll let you know. Here's my business card so you can contact me. Also, I'll need a room for the night."

"Lucky you, we have plenty of vacant rooms, as usual. I'll put you up in the rock star suite. It's the one room with a TV."

"Splendid, and it was a pleasure doing business with you and this fine establishment."

The thing about people who live in the back of beyond is they generally have a great sense of humor. It is often as dry as their surroundings. 

Once I had unpacked and settled into my room, it was time for the dissection to begin. The frost was all gone and I now could examine the packaging more carefully. I removed it as though I was handling the Shroud of Turin. I didn't want to tear it, and after a few tense minutes, I had it all off in one piece. I spread it flat and took a picture of it with my phone. It was from a brand I've never heard of: Don Diablo. On the wrapper, a cartoon devil leered at me and gave a toothy, sinister smile. I searched online for the Don Diablo website, but there was nothing, absolutely nothing, to be found. Now I was getting nervous. There is hardly a single fact so obscure that there isn't something on the internet about it. 

The burrito itself was an odd sight as well. There wasn't the slightest sign of freezer burn or any other spoilage. Dare I microwave it to see what it smells like when ready to eat? I put it in the microwave to warm it. Within a few seconds, an enchanting aroma filled my room. It was the scent of fine Mexican cuisine, savory and fresh. I couldn't believe such a scent could come from a gas station frozen burrito. 

I ran back to the store to fetch the cashier, for I knew he would be interested in this bizarre turn of events. We returned to the room which was now filled with an overpowering and delightful smell. It was almost as though the burrito somehow wanted us to eat it. 

"If you have a dog, we can feed a piece to it and see what happens", I suggested.

The clerk left and returned with his dog. He broke off a small piece and fed it to the dog. We watched it with trepidation for the next several minutes. The dog seemed fine, and it was getting harder and harder to resist the temptation to eat the remainder.

We split what was left and devoured it. Not only was it the most delicious burrito I've ever eaten, it was the best thing I've ever tasted. Not longer after, I was overcome with fatigue and decided it was time for bed. I fell asleep quickly.

What happened next is a mystery, though I did have terrible nightmares. All three of us including the dog woke up in the dirt a few miles from town. Dazed and confused, we groggily trudged back in.   

I packed up and prepared to leave. As I was about to embark, I suddenly felt a strange urge to look in the freezer again. What I saw horrified me. I called over the cashier to come see it. There in the freezer lay three burritos identical to the one I had bought. When I was back home, I got a letter from the cashier. In it, he lamented that his dog disappeared without a trace. It happened not long after someone bought and ate one of the mystery burritos. A coincidence, perhaps, but the cashier wrote that he hid one burrito in the back of his own freezer and mailed the other one to me. I stashed it in the back of my freezer. Some things are better left hidden. I hope and pray it is never found.   

Gator Fritters From Skipper's Smokehouse in Tampa, FL

The meat is chewy and succulent, like a combo of squid and steak fat. They're the best gator fritters I've eaten in Florida. It pairs well with IPAs and pilseners. The same restaurant was also featured on an episode of Man vs Food. 

My Global Audience

 I've gotten hits in the past week from 50+ countries. Yay me. 

Ukraine Endgame

Ukraine is running out of men, money, and ammo. It doesn't matter which runs out first, because the result will be the same: defeat.

Even if it somehow avoids running out of money and ammo, it has already run out of young men. 

***

Recruitment officers in Ukraine are so desperate for new recruits that they are resorting to conscription raids on gyms and shopping centers, per The Economist.

And an unnamed senior officer told the magazine that they are now seeing 45- to 47-year-old recruits who are "out of breath by the time they reach the front line."

According to The Economist, Ukraine recently sent a platoon of 20 soldiers to fight in Donbas, with some taken from villages without notice and one older man who didn't even have time to pick up his false teeth. After just one week of being in the trenches, three had been killed and another three seriously wounded, per the news outlet.

Given the lack of recruits, "we have no choice other than to be bloodthirsty," Viktor Kevlyuk, a retired colonel, told the Economist, calling for a new mobilization strategy for Ukraine.

***

As Ukraine's defenses are stretched thin, they will begin to crumble and collapse. In a year or less, they will be forced to accept a ceasefire. The only question left is how much territory they will lose in the end. 

My prediction is that Ukraine will cede the regions of Kharkiv and Dnepropetrovsk in addition to what Russia has already annexed. After that, there will be peace for maybe a decade before Russia attempts to conquer the rest of Ukraine. 

It's a tragic outcome and it could have been avoided if NATO had not steadily expanded eastward right up to the borders of Russia.

The Growth of NATO by Year

NATO is the Cold War dinosaur that refuses to go extinct. It will lumber on for as long as the US feeds it. That money would be better spent on solving America's many internal problems. In the words of the great philosopher Trump, sad!

Scenario for a war between China and Taiwan

This is the timeline I foresee:

1. China begins a blockade on Taiwan with submarines shortly after the 2024 US presidential election results are announced. The same events will happen regardless of the outcome, but the pace will be faster if Trump wins. Trump's philosophy is to stay out of conflicts that do not benefit the US. 

2. The US and its allies will impose sanctions on China. China will retaliate by blocking critical exports to the US. Taiwan puts naval mines in its waters. US warships and aircraft are staged in the region. 

3. Humanitarian aid to Taiwan begins to arrive by air and sea. The Chinese air force and navy attempt to stop them. Sooner or later, either a Chinese, US, or Taiwanese aircraft is shot down or one of their ships is fired upon.  

4. Air and naval skirmishes escalate. China begins bombarding Taiwan with ballistic and cruise missiles. This leads to a brief ceasefire and a round of negotiations. No agreement is reached, and the war resumes in weeks or days. 

5. Losses on all sides mount, but Taiwan's air force is the first to collapse. China gains air superiority as the US withdraws. Public pressure in the US prevents greater involvement, and protests in Hong Kong are violently suppressed. 

6. The amphibious assault on Taiwan proceeds and leads to a long, bloody battle for the rest of the island. Taiwan's government flees and its military surrenders after six months.

7. The war disrupts the supply of microchips and causes and worldwide economic slump. US dominance in the Pacific ends as China moves to consolidate control within the Nine-dash line. Australia, Vietnam, and the Philippines forge closer ties to counter that control.  

https://www.npr.org/2023/12/18/1216317476/china-military-taiwan-air-defense

***

...China has its sights on Taiwan. Some fear China's gray zone tactics are practice for a real invasion.

"[Chinese forces] can practice their military requirement as they need, and even they can test the response capability from the Taiwanese military," says Lee Hsi-ming, a retired Taiwanese admiral and a former defense chief.

Meanwhile, Taiwan is limited in how it can respond to Chinese pressure. For example, Lee says, every time a Chinese military plane or ship gets too close, Taiwan has to scramble its own jets or ships, and China just has way more of everything. 

***

https://www.businessinsider.com/pentagon-charts-show-chinas-military-advantage-over-taiwan-2022-1

***

China's navy vastly outnumbers Taiwan's, with many of its ships are assigned to the Eastern and Southern theater navies.

Those theater navies have 21 of China's 32 destroyers, 41 of its 48 frigates, 33 of 56 diesel-powered attack subs, and four of six nuclear-powered ballistic-missile subs. Those fleets also have 49 of China's 57 medium landing ships and amphibious transport docks, as well as one of China's two aircraft carriers.

By comparison, Taiwan's navy only has four destroyers, 22 frigates, and two submarines. Taiwan has 23 Coast Guard ships in service, a fraction of the Chinese Coast Guard's 223 ships.

...

China's air force (PLAAF) and naval aviation force added 100 fighters in 2020. The PLAAF now has 700 fighters, 250 of its 450 bombers/attack aircraft, and 100 of its 150 special-mission aircraft — such as electronic-warfare, reconnaissance, cargo, and tanker planes — stationed near Taiwan.

Taiwan's air force has 400 fighters, no bombers/attack aircraft, and 30 special-mission aircraft.

***

LTC Scheller and Billy Mitchell

 Scheller's speech can be seen below:

In the video, he acknowledges the risks he took by criticizing his superiors. From my own part, I thought he was being courageous by speaking out. In the end, he did lose his career and his pension, just as he feared. 

His case reminds of Billy Mitchell, who was the father of the USAF. The trouble started during a military exercise where he proved an airplane could sink a battleship. 

***

Mitchell was concerned that the building of dreadnoughts was taking precious defense dollars away from military aviation. He was convinced that a force of anti-shipping airplanes could defend a coastline with more economy than a combination of coastal guns and naval vessels. A thousand bombers could be built at the same cost as one battleship, and could sink that battleship.[24] Mitchell infuriated the Navy by claiming he could sink ships "under war conditions", and boasted he could prove it if he were permitted to bomb captured German battleships.

The Navy reluctantly agreed to the demonstration after news leaked of its own tests. To counter Mitchell, the Navy had sunk the old battleship Indiana near Tangier Island, Virginia, on November 1, 1920, using its own airplanes. Daniels had hoped to squelch Mitchell by releasing a report on the results written by Captain William D. Leahy stating that, "The entire experiment pointed to the improbability of a modern battleship being either destroyed or completely put out of action by aerial bombs."[25] When the New-York Tribune revealed that the Navy's "tests" were done with dummy sand bombs and that the ship was actually sunk using high explosives placed on the ship, Congress introduced two resolutions urging new tests and backed the Navy into a corner.[26]

In the arrangements for the new tests, there was to be a news blackout until all data had been analyzed at which point only the official news report would be released; Mitchell felt that the Navy was going to bury the results. The Chief of the Air Corps attempted to have Mitchell dismissed a week before the tests began, reacting to Navy complaints about Mitchell's criticisms, but the new Secretary of War John W. Weeks backed down when it became apparent that Mitchell had widespread public and media support.[27]

***

Mitchell was later demoted and court-martialed. 

***

The court found the truth or falsity of Mitchell's accusations to be immaterial to the charge and on December 17, 1925, found him "guilty of all specifications and of the charge". The court suspended him from active duty for five years without pay, which President Coolidge later reduced to half-pay.[57][4] The generals' ruling in the case wrote, "The Court is thus lenient because of the military record of the Accused during the World War."[58] MacArthur (who himself in 1951 was removed from duty for similar reasons) later said he had voted to acquit, and Fiorello La Guardia said that MacArthur's "not guilty" ballot had been found in the judges' anteroom.[59] MacArthur felt "that a senior officer should not be silenced for being at variance with his superiors in rank and with accepted doctrine."[50]

In 1958, Mitchell's son petitioned the Air Force Board for Correction of Military Records to reverse his father's conviction. The Board recommended vacating the conviction, but USAF Secretary James H. Douglas Jr. refused on the grounds that while Mitchell's airpower views "have been vindicated," this did not "affect the propriety or impropriety" of Mitchell's insubordinate behavior.[60][61] According to Douglas, by remaining on active duty, Mitchell "was bound to accept the consequences imposed by his service responsibilities."[61]

Later life

Mitchell resigned instead on February 1, 1926, and spent the next decade writing and preaching air power to all who would listen.[4] However, his departure from the service sharply reduced his ability to influence military policy and public opinion.

...

On February 19, 1936, Mitchell died in New York City at Doctors Hospital of a coronary occlusion. He had been admitted to the hospital on January 28. He was 56 years old.[64]

***

Mitchell's uniform is now on display at the USAF museum. 

In a similar of an Army officer named Howe, his defense asserted that:

***

2. Articles 88 and 133 are so vague and uncertain that they violate the Due Process clause of the Fifth Amendment.

***

Article 88 says:

That the accused was a commissioned officer of the United States armed forces;

That the accused used certain words against an official or legislature named in the article;

That by an act of the accused these words came to the knowledge of a person other than the accused; and

That the words used were contemptuous, either in themselves or by virtue of the circumstances under which they were used.

(Note: If the words were against a Governor or legislature, add the following element:)

That the accused was then present in the State, Territory, Commonwealth, or possession of the Governor or legislature concerned.

Article 133 says:

That the accused did or omitted to do certain acts; and

That, in the circumstances, these acts or omissions constituted conduct unbecoming an officer and gentleman.[

Greatest Want Ad Ever

 

In case it's hard to read, it says: men wanted for hazardous journey, small wages, bitter cold, long months of complete darkness, constant danger, safe return doubtful, honor and recognition in case of success.

Shackleton's expedition to Antartica:

***

Despite the outbreak of the First World War on 3 August 1914, Endurance was directed by the First Lord of the Admiralty, Winston Churchill, to "proceed",[g] and left British waters on 8 August.

***

Later

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In the early hours of the next morning, Shackleton summoned the expedition's physician, Alexander Macklin,[130] to his cabin, complaining of back pains and other discomfort. According to Macklin's own account, Macklin told him he had been overdoing things and should try to "lead a more regular life", to which Shackleton answered: "You are always wanting me to give up things, what is it I ought to give up?" "Chiefly alcohol, Boss", replied Macklin. A few moments later, at 2:50 a.m. on 5 January 1922, Shackleton suffered a fatal heart attack.[130]

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After the race to the South Pole ended in December 1911, with Roald Amundsen's conquest, Shackleton turned his attention to the crossing of Antarctica from sea to sea, via the pole. To this end, he made preparations for what became the Imperial Trans-Antarctic Expedition, 1914–1917. Disaster struck this expedition when its ship, Endurance, became trapped in pack ice and finally sank in the Weddell Sea off Antarctica on 21 November 1915. The crew escaped by camping on the sea ice until it disintegrated, then by launching the lifeboats to reach Elephant Island and ultimately South Georgia Island, a stormy ocean voyage of 720 nautical miles (1,330 km; 830 mi) and Shackleton's most famous exploit. In 1921, he returned to the Antarctic with the Shackleton–Rowett Expedition, but died of a heart attack while his ship was moored in South Georgia. At his wife's request, he was buried there. The wreck of Endurance was discovered just over a century later.[2][3]

Away from his expeditions, Shackleton's life was generally restless and unfulfilled. In his search for rapid pathways to wealth and security, he launched business ventures which failed to prosper, and he died heavily in debt. Upon his death, he was lauded in the press but was thereafter largely forgotten, while the heroic reputation of his rival Scott was sustained for many decades. Later in the 20th century, Shackleton was "rediscovered",[4] and became a role model for leadership in extreme circumstances.[5]

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The above pic is a screen grab from the following video at the 7:19 mark:

Greatest Covid Mask Meme Ever

 This got a [chef's kiss] from me.

Outbreak is fiction, but the protective gear shown in the lab scenes is realistic. Note that COVID would require the protection as seen above. That means a fully-enclosed suit with an independent air supply plus decontamination showers when entering and exiting the lab. 

Military Impostors at Antiwar Protest

I don't like the phrase "stolen valor", which was first made famous by a book with that same phrase as the title. That book debunked myths about the Vietnam War such as:

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that most Vietnam vets are baby-killing, wife-beating, drug addicts who cannot adjust to society

that blacks served and died disproportionately in Vietnam

that many who claim to be Vietnam vets were never in the military or were never in Vietnam or, if they 

were in Vietnam, they exaggerate their combat experience and heroism

that military personnel in Vietnam committed widespread atrocities

that so-called post-traumatic stress disorder is as extensive and as widespread as depicted by those who purport to suffer from it and by anti-war activists

that Vietnam vets commit suicide in disproportionate numbers and do so because they served in Vietnam

that Vietnam vets are disproportionately homeless and that the cause is their service in Vietnam

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You can read more about that here: Agent Orange never hurt anyone – John T. Reed (johntreed.com)

I'll add that John T Reed probably has the best military blog on the internet. 

Here is a video from a recent antiwar protest:

While watching this video, I couldn't help but notice the incorrect placement of the US flag and deployment patches. Behold:

Note the patch above the US flag. I suppose he added that patch later as a form of protest, but that is not the proper place for such a patch. On a US Army uniform, the patch for a unit you deployed with goes beneath the US flag like so:

This protester had his patches in the right places:

The next guy has patches in the wrong places:

And this guy's patches are in the wrong places too. The US flag should over his deployment patch, which indicates he was in the 3rd Infantry Division. 

The first thing people will do to get what they want is lie. Liars often count on people being gullible, ignorant, or too lazy to check anything. I doubt very much any of these protesters were asked by the event organizers for evidence of their military experience. 

I'll add that I probably agree with the protesters in that the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan were colossal blunders. The US should not have invaded Iraq and US troops should have left Afghanistan after bin Laden was killed. 

Fat Me and Thin Me

Below is a picture of me from early 2015. I took it the day I decided to join the Army. I weighed 207 pounds at the time and had to lose 50 pounds to get in. That took six months of walking uphill 10 or 15 miles on a treadmill every day. It was the hardest thing I've ever done and is still a source of pride for me. Unfortunately, I gained back a lot of it, and I weigh 184 pounds as of this morning. 

For comparison, here's a pic of me from about 2008 when I lived in Tanzania. I weighed 129 pounds at the time. I'm still not sure how I got so thin over there. I wasn't even trying to lose weight. I ate well and my only exercise was about an hour of walking per day. 

NSA Protest

Here is some background: in mid-October of 2021, I threw my phone in protest through the turnstile of the Whitelaw NSA building near Augusta, GA. This came over six months after I figured out NSA, my former employer, was spying me. I had been pressured into buying that smartphone and later replaced it with another. A screenshot from that phone, my current one, is below.  After I threw it, Detective Hernandez of the Fort Gordon (now Fort Eisenhower) military police contacted me. 

Here is the rest of my message which is shortened above: 

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It's nice to know I can count on my fellow soldiers to lie to me and torment me. I just wanted to be a good Arabic linguist. Also, do you think it's a good idea to humiliate and destroy the livelihood of a guy who was on suicide watch and recently had access to huge amounts of top-secret information? Thank you for your service and God bless America. 

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Let the record show that Detective Hernandez did not respond. When I entered the base formerly known as Fort Gordon that day, I was handcuffed, taken to the police station, and interrogated by NSA special agents. At that time, I was informed I was banned from the base formerly known as Fort Gordon and all NSA facilities. So yeah, they called me onto the base formerly known as Fort Gordon in order to inform me that I was banned from the base of the base formerly known as Fort Gordon. Military intelligence at its finest. Amusingly, a few months after I was banned, I was given special permission to enter so I could pick up my gal pal at the base hospital. I will post the rest of that story later. 

Smarter Than the Average Bear

Over the years, I've racked up some intellectual achievements. Here are some of them. Below is my perfect score on the ASVAB. I know I got a perfect score because the proctor came and told me about 30 seconds after I submitted it. My Army GT score is within two points of what my IQ was measured at when I was eight. I've read that GT and IQ are usually almost the same. I once had a boss pester me about my IQ. I told him I didn't think it mattered much, but since he insisted, I told him. He then hastily and unconvincingly claimed his was higher. If that's the case, it was not evident from his poor writing. Or anything else he said or did. 

In 2003, I got into UCLA. It's often ranked as one of the best public universities in the world. I ended up going to WVU to avoid student loans. That was a smart move. WVU - Where Greatness Is Learned and Couches Are Burned. I earned my degree in chemical engineering there. 

Later, I joined the Army and graduated from the Arabic course at the Defense Language Institute. Only about half the students there graduate the course. Language learning ability declines with age. I must be one of the outliers because I was 32 when I passed the last test. 

Here are most of my college grades. I'm still proud of the "A" I got in multivariable calculus in 2004.

In August of 2021, I applied to NSA to be a code breaker. I didn't think I was smart enough for that, but they think I might be. It'd be nice to work there again. I felt at home there. Ideally, I'd be sitting in a bean bag chair at Fort Meade, eating Cheetos, and breaking codes. It'd be a nice, quiet life of solving math problems. I guess if I was Joe Biden's nephew, I wouldn't have spent the last 2.5 years waiting for a job interview at a place I already worked at. 

I'm not sure why NSA even hires code breakers anymore. There are only a handful of ways to securely encrypt and transmit info, and almost no one uses them. Also, this site can identify almost every cipher/code for free: Code-Breaking, Cipher and Logic Puzzle solving tools | Boxentriq

Back in March, I passed the test to teach math in Florida. I expect to be returning to that field at some point. 

In the Peace Corps, I taught calculus in Swahili and did some other stuff. 

So while I don't have a PhD, a patent, or a Nobel Prize, I've done a lot more than most. I take some solace in that. I'm pretty sure I'm the only guy in history who's been in the Peace Corps, the Army, the NSA, and an insane asylum. Those are all stories for another time. 

Waste Money, Lose Wars, Anger Foreigners - The Apparent Purpose of the US Military

The title of this post is a reference to the apparent purpose of the US military since 1945. In the days of yore, congress would declare war, the whole nation would mobilize, and the war would be won. Since 1945, the general pattern has been this:

1. Start a war

2. Prolong it for as long as possible

3. Enrich the military industrial complex during Step 2

4. Lose

5. Abandon allies, as seen in the following video from Kabul in 2021

6. Repeat

Almost the same thing happened in Saigon in 1975.

Did I miss something? Whatever. Who cares? What else is on TV?

“War is a racket. It always has been. It is possibly the oldest, easily the most profitable, surely the most vicious. It is the only one international in scope. It is the only one in which the profits are reckoned in dollars and the losses in lives.” ― Smedley Butler, War is a Racket