River of Insults

I came from a humble family and had many siblings. It was decided when I was young that I would be a monk, as it was customary for at least one son in a family to take up that obligation. My training began when I was 12 at a local ashram. For the next eight years, I learned the dharma and Sanskrit when I was not meditating, doing chores, or begging. My teachers seemed to think well of me. Although we were discouraged from making comparisons, many did anyway, and I was considered above average in spiritual progress. I am still not sure what that means exactly, but I presume it is good. I tended to my father on his deathbed by saying prayers and giving blessings. I can see in my mother's eyes that she was proud that I was now a holy man of sorts. During his funeral and cremation, I conducted all the proper rituals. It was that day I felt that my long training had finally come to an end. 

After the funeral, I went to a nearby temple to see if I could join the monks there. Upon my arrival, a monk showed me to a waiting spot in the shade at the top of the temple steps. He told me to wait there and that the priest would fetch me later. So I sat on the steps and took in the scene. From my vantage point, I had a great view of the reflecting pool which perfectly showed the temple's towering pagoda. It was a serene image. As the hours passed, I watched the shadows lengthen as the daylight faded. Even when the stars had come out, the priest had still not come. I learned patience in the ashram and was not troubled by this. At last, exhaustion overtook me, and I stretched out sleep. All I had with me was a walking stick, a begging bowl, and a cloth sack with some food. I made the sack into a pillow to keep my head off the cold stone.  

I woke to the sound of a rooster's crow and began walking down the steps and toward the tree line to relieve myself. I had barely started down the steps when I heard a voice behind me.

"Leaving so soon? You just got here yesterday."

I turned and saw an old man I presumed was the priest of the temple.

"Pardon me, good sir. I was just off to answer the call of nature."

"Ah, understandable. Go on then. I'll wait here. By the way, the outhouse is over there, next to a chicken coop. The farmer lets us use it."

It was nice to learn something important and useful so early in the day. When I returned, the priest ushered me into a small room in the pagoda. We sat facing each other in the lotus position. 

"Thank you for having me today. It was a long walk to get here."

"Forgive me for making you wait overnight. It was a test. You'd be surprised to know how many new monks are not really serious about their vows. There are some that can't even stand to wait an hour or two in the shade."

"I'm glad to be one of the successful ones. For now, anyway."

"You have the right attitude and I think you'll do well here. Please go down to the river to fetch some water. I'll show you where the buckets are."

He took me to the storeroom, and I placed a bucket on each end of a pole. Then lifted it all and rested the pole on my shoulders behind my neck. I had fetched water in such a way many times before. The priest pointed toward the path and said I wouldn't get lost. 

Once I the path, I took some pleasure in the sights and sounds of the jungle. Rays of sunshine broke through the thick canopy, birds chirped and sang, and the sounds of splashing and women talking grew steadily louder. Once at the river, I saw a group on the river bank washing clothes and another group bathing nearby. I moved a bit upstream to find a spot with frothy, fast-flowing water. They saw me, but I was far enough away that there was no point in talking. A few waved and I waved back. They were talking loudly, and so I heard them clearly.

"Can't you filthy whores bathe somewhere else?" yelled one of the women washing clothes.

"We have to wash somewhere," yelled back one of the ones bathing.

"You're a disgrace to this village. Just go somewhere else."

"Most of our customers are your husbands!"

At that, a few from both groups charged at each other and I decided it was time to intervene else there would be a brawl. I ran towards them while waving my hands in the air and yelling.

"Hey there! Stop before someone gets hurt! Please!"

I ran into the water and got between the two groups. The sight of monk acting in such a way must have shocked them back to their senses. Once the scene had calmed a bit, I told them that they both had a right to use the river. 

"Those washing clothes should come in the morning and those bathing should come in the afternoon. This will keep the peace. If someone breaks the rules, go to the temple and tell one of the monks."

Everyone seemed satisfied with that, so I returned to my buckets, filled them, and made my way back to the temple. Upon my return, I made tea and brought some for the priest. 

"I heard you broke up a fight at the river earlier today."

"Yes. I see news travels fast here. I told them that..."

"Those washing should come in the morning and those bathing should come in the afternoon?"

"Yes! How did you know?"

"Many monks have tried that over the years. I even tried that when I was a new monk here. All women who used to argue there when I was a new monk here are dead and have been replaced. This has happened countless times over for centuries, as far as anyone can tell. It's like the cycle of samsara in miniature."

"Is there any hope of breaking the vicious cycle?"

"I think so, but I have no idea what could do that. Well, I have one idea, but it would cause such a scandal that I'd get chased away if it didn't work."

"And what is that idea, good sir?"

"I want to hold a dance contest between the two groups with the village men being the judges. Whichever group wins gets exclusive access to that part of the river. There are other places nearby to get water."

"If it helps, you can say it was my idea. That way if it goes badly, I get the blame and am banished. It's much easier for me to start over somewhere else as I have just begun my career."

"That's a very noble suggestion. It's settled then. Tomorrow, go to the river and inform them. For better or worse, the people of this area look to us for spiritual guidance and leadership. It is time for us to take action to end this strife."

So the next day I went to the river and approached the women directly. They had already ignored the advice I had given them yesterday about using the river at the same time.

"Hello again. I believe I have a way of settling this dispute once and for all. It has been given the blessing of the priest. The evening of the next full moon, five of you from each side will compete in a dance contest at the temple. We monks will be the judges. Whoever wins gets to use this part of the river and the losing group must go elsewhere."

They were dumbfounded, but weakly murmured that they agreed to the terms.

The evening before the contest, the other monks and I built two bonfires on either side of the reflecting pool so that we could better see the action. We also hoped that the fires would remind them of the way their own bad karma was burning them up. We lit the fires just after dark, which was the signal for the dancers begin. We hurried back to the steps of the pagoda so we could watch the action better.

Out from the trees, came two clusters of women. The were hooting and screeching as their jewelery jangled, and they each took up position on either side of the reflecting pool in front of the bonfires. For hours, they danced and gyrated in the most seductive ways. It seems it was too much for some of the monks. Many blushed or slinked away laughing. At last, they all finally gave up and lay on the ground to catch their breath. One from each group approached the pagoda steps to ask who had won. The priest eyed both of them and then rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

"As far as I can tell, both groups danced equally well. Therefore, there is no winner tonight. The losers, both here and in their future lives, are the ones who let their anger provoke them into foolishness. I beg of you, let yourselves be reincarnated, so to say, in this life. You'll be happier if you do."

I was skeptical of what impact, if any, the priest's words would have. As it turned out, the events of that night put an end to the feud and have entered into local lore. It's been 40 years since then, and I am now the priest of the temple. Every day since it happened, I went to the river to work a little on carving an image of Buddha into one of the boulders there. It is finally finished.