The sobriety chips were a way to curry favor with Alexandra. Later, the mysterious government guys returned while I was at home and Alexandra was away. They were two guys in their 30s wearing suits. NSA, I thought.
"Mr. Murphy? Hi, I'm Bob and this is Jim. Do you have some time to talk?"
"Sure. Alexandra won't be back for a few hours."
"Perfect. Do you mind if we record our conversation?"
"No, but I'm wondering how you'd get a tape recorder through the door. Those things are huge."
Jim opened is briefcase in my face as if to say behold! or ta da! It was the smallest tape recorder I'd ever seen.
"How did you guys get that?"
"Nice weather we're having today, Mr. Murphy. How about we sit at the kitchen table?"
"OK. Please, come in and have a seat."
"Now, Mr. Murphy. Tell me a bit about yourself. Your hopes, dreams, fears, favorite color, anything you like."
"I live olive drab, AKA Army green. I like beer, but I shouldn't drink it anymore. Or at least drink way less. By the way, who are you guys with?"
"Uncle Sam, just like you. What makes you happy?"
"I like nature, poetry, history...just learning in general, I guess."
"Very interesting. Ever had an IQ test?"
"Yeah, it was good but not off-the-charts good. I like to say it doesn't matter if you have more degrees than a thermometer if you're sharp as a marble."
"That sounds like a Foghorn Leghorn quote."
"Yeah, I watched a lot of cartoons as a kid. And WW2 movies."
"Alexandra said you speak Vietnamese and Russian. How well?"
"I'd call myself fluent in Vietnamese. I can translate written Russian, but I'd need a dictionary."
"Do you have a job? A source of income?"
"I'm unemployed, but I saved up enough in the Army that I will be OK for a while. I have few expenses."
"What was going through mind during the incident in Amity? How did it start?"
"It was a perfect storm of stressors. I had just gotten back from Vietnam, proposed marriage, found out a dear friend died, and then was told to hitch hike 40 miles when I was hungry."
"Anyone would feel overwhelmed in a such situation like that. Can you explain your reaction? Why you did it?"
"My threshold for fear has steadily declined my whole life and I got used to trusting my instincts in dangerous and confrontational situations."
"That's a great thing for combat. Do you still feel you are at war? If so, who with?"
"A fish forgets it's in water. Maybe that's what happened to me. My body returned from the battlefield, but my mind is still there, so to say."
"Interesting theory. Do you mind telling me about any traumatic experiences you had?"
"The worst part was when I was chained upside down and tortured with scopolamine. I spent hours in nightmarish agony. Then I had to kill two guys quickly to escape. I stabbed and strangled the first one, stole his pistol, and shot the other. Then I ran into the jungle until I found some friendly villagers."
"You're an exceptionally brave and capable man. We want to help you adjust to civilian life so you can be productive and happy."
"Sounds good to me. I've been working on that. I'm in therapy and AA."
"Have you thought about teaching Russian or Vietnamese at the college in town here?"
"That could be good, but I'm under house arrest now and will be for months."
"What if a courier brought Vietnamese or Russian documents here? Could you type up translations and reports on them? We'd pay you."
"Sure, that would be easy. At least for me, not sure about the courier."
"Fort Meade is not far from here, Mr. Murphy."
"Now I know you're NSA."
"I see nothing gets by you."
"I notice little things and connect the dots. It's called hypervigilance."
"Please elaborate."
"You came here with an advanced piece of technology after Alexandra told me about you and your curiosity about my foreign language knowledge. You asked me questions about my personality and intelligence and then mentioned Fort Meade. Putting all that together makes it clear you work for NSA."
"How did you learn to think like that?"
"I read all the Sherlock Holmes stories as a kid and tried to apply them in real life. I got very good at it after a few years."
"Have you ever had a polygraph test? Are you willing to take 1?"
"I've heard of them but have never taken one. I'm open to it."
"We can do it here. It's important for the subject to be in a quiet, comfortable place."
"This place is very quiet late at night on weekdays. And I'm a night owl anyway."
"All well and good. We're very interested in bringing you on board. You'd be contributing to national defense and the battle against communism."
"I like the sound of that. And my schedule is wide open."
"How about this? We'll come back a week from now. It's called a full-scope polygraph, meaning will be asking you about many aspects of your life."
"I have no problem with that."
"Well then, it was very nice meeting you and we'll see you next week. Have a nice day."
And so they left. Later that day, Alexandra returned.
"Those government guys came again today. I spoke with them. I was right. They are with NSA."
"What did they say?"
"They asked me some questions and scheduled a polygraph here for next week."
"What is that and how do you feel about it?"
"It's sometimes called a lie detector test. I feel good about it. I've been through far worse. Not worried a bit. How was your day?"
I was expecting a very detailed answer. Every word she spoke and who with, etc. A minute-by-minute account of her day.
"Do you really care or are you just trying to be nice?"
"It's the thought that counts, isn't it?"
"Do you really believe that?"
"It depends. The road to hell is paved with good intentions."
"And the human fortune cookie strikes again."
"How did you learn all these snappy comebacks?"
"Short answer, mean girls in Catholic school."
"Sounds like a verbal bloodbath. Glad you survived. What are we eating for dinner?"
"I've been at the college library most of the day researching Vietnam. I found a few recipes. Want to try them?"
"Fabulous idea, though I didn't cook anything over there."
"Not a problem. All you have to do is eat and tell me if it tastes right."
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