Back in 2021, I chatted up a woman online. She must have enjoyed my jokes as she sent me this picture:
The conversation which came beforehand:
Me: Why did the pizza burn the hipster's tongue? Because he ate it before it was cool.
Her: Is that somehow related to eating pussy?
Me: I suppose it could be with enough effort. There are restaurants in Japan where men eat off of naked ladies. That must make for interesting job interviews.
"What did you do at your last job?"
"I was a plate."
Her: I've never had sushi but I would probably be a plate
Me: Yeah, the life of an animate utensil is not for me. Which reminds me of the terrifying philosophical implications of the cursed servants in Beauty and the Beast.
Her: Anne rice wrote a version of beauty and the Beast that's erotica. Beauty was a sex slave
Me: Kinky. Was it called "50 Shades of Grey Poupon"?
Her: [sends pic of herself with her underwear in her mouth]
Me: You see, that's the sort pic that I just couldn't pull off. Not that I've ever tried to entice women by sending them pictures of me with my underwear in my mouth. There's a first time for everything though.
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