Dream Cheese

The blue spots in blue cheese are from mold. In fact, the mold is of the genus Penicillium, and thus blue cheese itself contains the antibiotic penicillin. However, like other fungi, the mold also secretes mild hallucinogens. There have been experiments which have confirmed that eating a small amount of blue cheese before bed produces vivid dreams more often than a placebo. I have done my own experiments in this regard and can say conclusively that for me at least, blue cheese is dream cheese. It works particularly well when paired with a strong red wine, but any alcohol at all seems to heighten the effect. The LSD advocate Timothy Leary said a hallucinogenic experience depends on set and setting, and it is most desirable to carefully control both in order to avoid a so-called bad trip. In my view, the only bad trips are the ones you wish for, but never go on. 

My first voyage into dream land was somewhat unplanned. At the time, I didn't know that whatever I watched or listened to before bed would set the stage for the upcoming dream. I ate the dream cheese and drank some wine. After that, I watched a documentary about an undersea lab and habitat. The structure was about 50 ft below sea level and had bunks for four people, though there were usually only two or three people there at any given time. In many regards, it was cramped like a spacecraft and its occupants had similar challenges to astronauts. The project was the brainchild of Cold War era scientists who saw the ocean floor as a new arena in the simmering global conflict. As the documentary ended, I felt my eyelids get heavy. It was time to turn out the lights and see what would happen next. As I drifted off to sleep, I felt a kind of slow sinking sensation. In subjective time, I felt like I'd been sinking for an hour.

At last, I touched down on the sand with a gentle thud. As I stood up and looked around, I could see a trail of bubbles coming up from my regulator. They rose up hundreds of feet to the surface while faint rays of sunlight danced around me. It appeared I had weights on my boots and waist for negative buoyancy, and my field of vision was restricted by a small porthole-like opening just in front of my eyes. Ahead in the distance, a stranger beckoned me to come. It was slow going, but eventually we came face to face. At least, we could see each other's eyes, but not much else. We walked on a sandy path through a sort of garden, except with coral and fish instead of birds and flowers. A humpback whale swam over us and bellowed out the first bars of its song. It was a haunting series of moans and whines. My companion and I continued our stroll until we reached a huge structure with a ladder poking down. It was a long climb, perhaps 50 feet, though of course, I had no worry of being injured in case I fell. 

At the end of the ladder, I breached the surface, and an unseen device grabbed me and lifted me out of the entry pool. It set me down on a bench where I removed my helmet and was able to look around more easily. I was inside some huge undersea facility. Here and there, groups of workers moved to and fro while others hunched over consoles. There were multiple floors inside though it was all made of a kind of steel grating. I removed the rest of my diving suit with some difficulty and donned a pair of flip flops to explore the interior of the vessel. At this point, my companion was long gone somehow, but perhaps he or she would turn up again later. I made my way to what appeared to be the largest and busiest section. There were a few dozen workers at computer consoles and several large screens. Some of them showed maps while others showed live video of divers working on the sea floor.  

As I walked past the consoles, I could see what all the workers were doing. It was interesting that none of them seemed to pay the slightest attention to me. In fact, the workers would always scatter or otherwise turn their backs on me whenever I approached. On a platform high above it all, I saw a luxurious chair with control panels on either side. As it was empty and this was a dream, I decided I might as well sit in the big boss chair. After the strain of my submarine sojourn, it was a great relief to have a comfortable place to sit. As I played with the controls on the console, I was able to change view on the big screen. One button changed the view on the screen to a large, intimidating logo. It featured an octopus with its tentacles wrapped around the globe. Was this the logo of the organization which owned the undersea facility I was in? It seemed likely. It also seemed likely that this was some sort of sinister organization. 

I spent a long time sitting in that chair and no one came up to kick me out of it. Thus, I could only conclude that I was the head honcho of whatever this nefarious enterprise might be. A moment later, one of my underlings handed me a kind of remote control with an ominous red button on it. I was unsure whether I should push it or not. Curiosity got the best of me in the end. After all, this was a dream. What's the worst that could happen? I pushed the button and watched a montage of destruction on the screen. It seemed famous seaside cities around the world were being hit by tidal waves. Another one of my underlings was about to hand me a drink when he tripped and spilled it on me. As soon as I felt the wetness, I awoke. Apparently, I had sleepwalked to my refrigerator and in my stupor, knocked a plastic jug of water onto the floor. It appeared I had made a half-hearted attempt to mop it up with a towel before lying down in it. Later, I realized the only question left was at what point in the dream did I get wet in real life.